Yesterday, I was tired. It was a lazy Sunday afternoon, I had gone to church, went to the store with my dad because my mom didn’t feel well, fixed lunch and laid down for a nap.
I recently started hosting at a local eatery and worked both Friday and Saturday night.
I would wake up from my naps when my dryer alarm would go off, check or switch clothes around and nap again.
I was in the midst of one of these naps, when there was a knock at my door. As no one ever comes to visit except my parents, this took me by surprise.
I grabbed my phone and called someone so there was a connection to the outside world before opening the door.
When I answered the door it was a friend of mine. He needed to talk. He needed a safe space to let his guard down and say what was in his heart. Here I was, no bra, in my napping clothes and my hair all over my head.
He didn’t care. He just needed to talk to his friend. He knew that there would be no judgement to what he was saying. I would not offer advice unless he asked for it.
He sat on my sofa and spoke in a hummingbird like manner. Jumping from subject to subject yet somehow managing to connect the garbled thoughts spilling from him.
He stayed for a couple of hours. When he left he thanked me for allowing him into my home. He just needed a safe space to be real.
The same thing happened Saturday. A young friend who is being yo-Yoed around by a guy needed to talk. She needed me to be present while she tried to figure somethings out for herself, it was just easier to have another body in the car while she was driving and talking.
She asked me some questions and I told her how I felt, not being brutally honest but honest. She is going to be hurt. I can’t stop that. She wants the fairytale and Prince Charming has a wandering eye.
Being the personality type I am, when those close to me hurt I hurt as well. So much so that it woke me up Saturday night. Foolishly, I posted a comment on social media that turned around to bite me.
I am glad to be a safe space. I carry a great deal of others worries. It is one of the things I am good at.
I care for people. I am grateful to be there when others need someone, I know what it is not to have a listening ear in the middle of the night. It sucks. It blows. It is horrible.
You have to be careful and never let just anyone see it for they will use it against you. So if my friends need a safe space, I will be there. Today and always.