The Big Pile Of “I Don’t Know”

You get to points in your life where you just don’t know about some things. I am in one of those moments in time. Right now, I am trying to sort through some things and figure out who is telling me lies and feeding me candy, so to speak.

I know some people speak out of both sides of their face. I have lived through that and I have learned from that so for right now, I am letting people do the talking, I am doing the listening. Keep your mouth shut, keep your ears open.

I am hearing a great number of this could happen, that could happen, you may be here,  you may be there, you could be doing this, you could be doing that, you have been assigned to this committee. This, that and the other thing. I don’t know who to believe at this point.

Having evacuated once to save my own sanity, I am cautious. Overly cautious.

Right now, I gotta take care of me. I can’t do that again.

I am in the big pile of I don’t know. I hate being there. I need to know where I stand, cause if you don’t know, you stand no where.

So right now, I am quite. I am keeping to myself. I am going to let it play out.

I thought about this today as I cleaned out a closet of clothes I never wear. I would like to wear them but the time has not presented itself. It will. I have all kinds of dress clothes for going to nice place and I never go.

So, today I set a timer. 1 hour. I was going to clean this closet in one hour. I took all the clothes out of this closet. There was the keep pile, the donate pile and the I don’t know pile.

The keep and donate went rather quickly. I noticed that the I don’t know pile just kept growing. So, I started trying on clothes. Too loose, too tight, doesn’t look right. The one factor that decided a great deal was how it felt on my skin. Okay maybe two things… the second, how did my butt look in it. Honestly.  If it didn’t feel right or made my butt look big, it was outta here.

I have enough in my life that doesn’t feel right at this point. Clothing was not going to be one of those things that I had to deal with the rubs me wrong.

Just as I slipped the last I don’t know over my head, the timer went off. I had accomplished my goal. One of the I don’t knows has been dealt with.


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