Dear Negative Committee,
I know you live in my head. You have deep roots for you have lived there all my life. You do your job well. You have convinced me that I am never good, smart or pretty enough.
You have taken me to dark places and left me there to die. You have made me feel less than and inferior. You have made me feel like I don’t deserve to be loved. You have made me not acknowledge compliments for fear I would sound cocky instead of honored.
Well, the positive committee I met today, they are now ready to make you squirm. They don’t live in my head. They are real people. They are little people but real.
When I walked into a class room today and met a little girl for the first time and she looked at me and her eyes widened and she said “You’re Beautiful”. I knew it was true. They don’t have filters. They say exactly what they are thinking. She honest to God thought I was beautiful. No strings attached. No but…..
When I was bum rushed into a group hug. I felt loved. A few of the kids knew me but most didn’t. That didn’t matter to them. They just knew I was one of them. And they loved me for it.
When one of the teacher’s assistants called the next class room and told them that I was running a little behind but it would totally be worth it, after having me tell a story for the second time strictly for her own benefit because she laughed so hard the first time and another one told me that I could take it “on the road”. I knew that those whispers you bestow upon me of “give it up”, “you can’t do this” “it’s too hard” were poppycock.
So when you sit in there and tell me that my life is crappy, that no one could ever love me or care for me want me or desire me, that I am nothing. You are wrong!! I am as lovable and desirable as anyone else.
I am going to add these voices to the cheerleaders in my life already; my person, my best friend, my mom, my girls…..yes, these voices will join the cheer of “You got this” and “I believe in you when you don’t “
So you have been given due notice. Evacuate or silence the choice is yours.