If you read my last post, it sounds like gibberish. My best friend called me after she read it and said it makes no sense. I thought about changing it but I think I will leave it. My reasoning, I want to remember what I am like when I let my life run me instead of me running my life.
So I have today off. I made a promise to my person that I would take some time off before the play performance. If I tell myself to slow down and rest, I will do things that I see that need to be done. For example I have planned for a week to be off these two days. A teacher sent me an e-mail about bringing her class to the library. I seriously considered working today because of that. There are other people that can do it but it is my job. However, since I had made a promise, and I don’t make promises I am not going to keep. I asked a co-worker to step into my place. It is hard for me to release this part of my job. Storytelling is great and this age group is so much fun.
So physically for the next two days, I am relaxed mode. Mentally, my inner domestic goddess is yelling at me. Look at the mess you have made in this house this week. You have run in, thrown stuff down, gone to sleep grabbed new stuff only to run out the door again. There are unfinished projects laying in your floor. There is laundry to be done. The few dishes you have dirtied need to be washed and all you want to do is lay on the frikkin’ couch.
Yes, my dear, sweet, loud mouthed, inner domestic goddess, that is exactly what I want to do today.
I need to take care of me. I need to mentally hide in my blanket fort. I need to try to spend some time just lounging about. I need a break from running in and out the door. I NEED to BE STILL. You are going to have to put up with what you do not see as perfect because I am only human. It will be here tomorrow and hopefully so will I. I might pick up a thing or two, if I want to. I might not want to. I might just lay right where I am and look at my half finished projects and plan for new ones, I will write a blog post, I will have the same movie in the dvd player that has been the background noise for my life for the last month, I will think about the story I am working on, I will day dream……and I will do it laying on my couch!!!