Yesterday, I spoke to the fact that heredity plays a big part in who we are but so do our experiences.
if you have been following this blog any amount of time, you know I have three great-nieces. One of them Ii refer to as my “Mini Me”. After my husband passed away, she made it her personal mission to “take care” of me. She loves coming over to my place and hanging out. I let her be her creative little self. We do art projects and science experiments. She thinks I am cool. She is cool!!
She is struggling right now. She is in the third grade. Life should not be hard for someone in the third grade. She should not be panicking about things at this age. She is. We have another thing in common.
Something was not explained to her properly at school and she felt like she was being punished not helped. This is a seasoned teacher and her communication skills could have been better. Now my mini me doesn’t want to go to school. She hates school. She is sick each morning because of the panic she feels.
I know that feeling I lived through it. For three long years, I knew that sense of dread.
I have often wondered why I had to go through this fear of just going to school. Now I know. Someone very close to me, down the road would need me to say, it is okay. The same thing happened to me. You are not alone. There is no need to be afraid. It now falls to me, the person who knows exactly how it feels to want to throw up when someone mentions school, to say Oh no little girl, you march right into that school and show them what you are made of. Prove them wrong. Make yourself a force to be reckoned with and be kind to others because you know how it feels to be put down.
As I was talking to my niece, I saw my childhood ran through my mind. I now know that I had to go through these same feeling to be able to help her.
Sometimes, I feel like I am being cleaned out, to be filled up anew. Some of the things I have never dealt with, it is time.
You truly can’t fly when you are loaded down.